Part of me wonders what friends I have left now that he walked away from me. Who ever they are they have no idea how bad I hurt right now.

Ben broke up with me.

there I said it. I told you his name. I told you the truth. I lost my boyfriend and my best friend in one breath yesterday and now I'm lost. Standard line of "I just want to be friends."

good luck with that. I'll never hate him but I can never look at him the same way. What fucks with my head the most is that I know I had it coming. I knew. I just keep having these moments where it's hard to breath and you know I don't cry right... right. Why don't you tell me how to make it stop.