I almost got hit by a car today, a big green pick up truck that was barreling down Wacker drive this morning. I was crossing against the light, as always. It's been all that I can think about. What if I had become road kill this morning? What if that truck had slammed into me at the 40 odd miles per hour it was going and sent me flying into the air and crushing my skull on the pavement. My first reaction was the obvious oh fuck that was close but after that passed I felt nothing and that kind of bothered me. Shouldn't I have felt something? Something to remind me that I was glad that I didn't get my body squished or the simple fact that I was still alive? I actually tried to force a thought like that on myself but it wouldn't stick.

on that happy note... I'm off to buy mass quantities of drugs tonight. Having no money this should prove interesting. How much are blow jobs good for these days? It's been a while since I've turned a trick.