Ok. I watch a LOT of info-mercials because of issues that I won't go into for the millionth time. Now I've seen a lot of crazy wonderful things on these info-mercials but never have I seen something that I've dreamt of in my most boring dreams... A carpet comb. Now let me explain what this is so that some bastard can go out, make it and make a fuck ton of money off my brilliance. Throw the name Susan at it somehow and I'll call it a fair trade...
The Carpet Comb. See I have long hair and carpet on the floor of my room. The combination is not very nice though. You see, every day I wake up and take a shower and brush my hair. I stand in my room, specifically in front of my mirror, to do this and I find that I always have to check to see that the floor isn't fucked from rogue strands of hair. (Which could lead to an interesting tangent thought that I have about rogue strands of hair, in general, but I'm holding back. Perhaps another time.)
Now the reason I know that this would be a wonderful product is because my issues with finding hair in the carpet isn't isolated to morning grooming habits. It's constantly. Just as I sat down to check my email today, moments ago, I was horrified by feeling one of my own hairs on my foot, yards away from where it was brushed. Have you ever climbed into bed and found a single hair wrapped around your toes so that you don't notice it at first but later when you discover the hint of discomfort you have to search to find the source? I have. Have you ever put on a sock and discovered that somehow between lifting your foot and putting the sock on a single hair is sandwiched between toes and sealed in to the foot/sock combination? I have.
So either I'm shaving my head or one of you bitches is going to make this for me. It would be so easy. I bet I could hold out with a wide toothed comb but I want an actual Carpet Comb. I'd pay for it if I saw it on TV. It would be beautiful- and considering the recent display of many "in between vacuum" products that I saw just last night it seems to be the time.
Speaking of vacuuming... You might be wondering why I don't just vacuum more regularly. Well first off, I'm lazy but besides that I still have to run my fingers over my carpet before I vacuum anyhow because the hair clogs the vacuum and my mom gets pissed. So then I have to sit there with scissors and pry the tightly wound hair out of the bottom of the vacuum. It's not fun. I'd like to never do that again. Maybe the Carpet comb can be taken a step farther and made into an actual vacuum attachment somehow.
This is my challenge for the world for today. If anyone makes any progress email me about it. I'd like to know. I would offer to help financially but that idea is laughable considering how broke I am right now. So GO! GO! GO!
The Carpet Comb. See I have long hair and carpet on the floor of my room. The combination is not very nice though. You see, every day I wake up and take a shower and brush my hair. I stand in my room, specifically in front of my mirror, to do this and I find that I always have to check to see that the floor isn't fucked from rogue strands of hair. (Which could lead to an interesting tangent thought that I have about rogue strands of hair, in general, but I'm holding back. Perhaps another time.)
Now the reason I know that this would be a wonderful product is because my issues with finding hair in the carpet isn't isolated to morning grooming habits. It's constantly. Just as I sat down to check my email today, moments ago, I was horrified by feeling one of my own hairs on my foot, yards away from where it was brushed. Have you ever climbed into bed and found a single hair wrapped around your toes so that you don't notice it at first but later when you discover the hint of discomfort you have to search to find the source? I have. Have you ever put on a sock and discovered that somehow between lifting your foot and putting the sock on a single hair is sandwiched between toes and sealed in to the foot/sock combination? I have.
So either I'm shaving my head or one of you bitches is going to make this for me. It would be so easy. I bet I could hold out with a wide toothed comb but I want an actual Carpet Comb. I'd pay for it if I saw it on TV. It would be beautiful- and considering the recent display of many "in between vacuum" products that I saw just last night it seems to be the time.
Speaking of vacuuming... You might be wondering why I don't just vacuum more regularly. Well first off, I'm lazy but besides that I still have to run my fingers over my carpet before I vacuum anyhow because the hair clogs the vacuum and my mom gets pissed. So then I have to sit there with scissors and pry the tightly wound hair out of the bottom of the vacuum. It's not fun. I'd like to never do that again. Maybe the Carpet comb can be taken a step farther and made into an actual vacuum attachment somehow.
This is my challenge for the world for today. If anyone makes any progress email me about it. I'd like to know. I would offer to help financially but that idea is laughable considering how broke I am right now. So GO! GO! GO!
1 Comments:
I have seen such an item and currently looking for it again. it was use by a carpet cleaning company that did my carpets about 4 years ago. The previous owners had pets and this carpet comb not only pick up surface hair, it got out what ever had been inbedded in.
Post a Comment
<< Home